It would be impossible for me to remain silent following Adam
Yauch’s passing. The Beastie Boys meant more to me than any other musical group
ever has or ever will. They hit me at a time in my life when music, self-identity
and youth were swirling around in a nebulous morass, and they provided a bit of
a roadmap on how to view the world and how to act in it. It may seem like I am
overstating things, but they really meant that much to me. They really did.
I grew up straddling two different worlds. On one side was
the mostly white, working-class, Italian-American town I grew up in. Not a
half-mile down the road was one of the roughest cities in Massachusetts,
largely Latino and immigrant. It wasn’t like living in a cosmopolitan cultural
hub such as New York City, but it made me more worldly than you’d expect, and it
exposed me to various aspects of each culture. One of those aspects was music.
From the white kids in my hometown, I encountered 80s pop
and hard rock. I fell in love with hair metal and cheesy 80s hits, both of
which I adore today. From the Puerto Rican and Dominican kids (and from Yo! MTV
Raps), I heard hip hop and rap music. I felt like I was one of a select group
of people whose taste inhabited both worlds. During my early teenage years (a time when music is an integral part of your self-identity), I
wasn’t sure how to navigate these contradictory tastes. I wasn’t one
thing or another; I was a lot of both. When Check Your Head dropped in 1992, everything
suddenly started to make sense.
One of the most enduring memories I have of junior high is me
and two friends running around my house with the TV cranked up full blast dancing
and rapping along to So What Cha Want. Here was a band I could finally relate
to. They not only rapped, but also played their own instruments. It felt almost
revolutionary at the time.
This is all well and good, but what did the Beasties teach
me?
Follow your muses. Be true to yourself. Do some good in the
world. And have a little fun doing it. Aren’t these lessons we could all learn from?
One story has always stood out for me that highlights this
lesson. This is from DMC writing about the Beasties in Rolling Stone:
“The first time we toured with the Beastie Boys was the Raising
Hell tour in 1986: Run-DMC, Whodini, LL Cool J and the Beastie Boys.
We were playing the Deep South — Crunkville, before there was crunk — and it
was just black people at those shows. The first night was somewhere in Georgia,
and we were thinking, "I hope people don't leave when they see them."
But the crowd loved them, because they weren't trying to be black rappers. They
rapped about shit they knew about: skateboarding, going to White Castle, angel
dust and television. Real recognizes real.”
It may seem like a cliché, but I saw that staying true to
yourself and following your interests in an authentic way was a great step
toward finding yourself and gaining respect. This is critical for any teenager,
or even any human being, to learn.
I wasn’t a hip hop guy, I wasn’t a rock guy, I wasn’t a
jock, I wasn’t a nerd. I was a mix of all those things. So were they. They
rapped about Isaac Newton, doing illicit things to girls with whiffle ball
bats, the New York Knicks and even tried to free Tibet.
This mix led them to become perhaps the most influential
tastemakers in pop music in the 90s. They released a criminally underrated
magazine (Grand Royal) that popularized the term ‘mullet’ for the haircut, they had their own record label and influenced fashion to
the point that I looked like Mike D for a good 8 year stretch.
But let’s bring things back to Adam Yauch. He wasn’t necessarily
my favorite Beastie; that was always Ad Rock. But in reading the obituaries and
listening to the interviews with other members of the Beastie Boys and people
close to them, it has become clear that Adam was the beating heart of the
group. And in the end, Adam was the one I probably came to respect the most.
He started off just as wild as the other two, if not the
most wild. Although they were parodying the frat boy lifestyle, they eventually
embraced it. MCA was perhaps the first to see how empty it could be. While
recording Paul’s Boutique, he began to take hallucinogenics and explored his spirituality.
This eventually led him on a journey to Asia, where he encountered Buddhism.
The wildest of the Beastie Boys was now on a spiritual
quest. Part of this was discovering the plight of the Tibetan people in China.
He organized the now-legendary Tibetan Freedom Concerts that helped the issue attain a prominence in America that
surprised many observers. But when the cause started to overwhelm him, he knew
to step back and return to his first love, music.
Despite this increasing spirituality and attention paid to social
justice issues, Adam never lost his sense of humor. He created a Humpty Hump-esque alter ego, the famed
director Nathaniel Hornblower, who supposedly hailed from a nook in the
Swiss Alps. He even crashed the stage at the MTV movie awards dressed as
Nathaniel when Sabotage didn’t win best video of the year in 1994:
Adam also embraced growing up and maturity without ever
losing that sense of playfulness. He rapped about having grey hair. He felt
contrite about some of his antics and misogynism he displayed as a youth. In
response, he dropped a few legendary lines on Ill Communication’s 'Sure Shot' about having respect for women,
something you don’t hear much of in hip hop, a fact even a lover of the genre
such as me has to admit.
Perhaps the thing that really stands out to me now is that
he kept trying to stretch his artistic boundaries and follow his interests where
they led him. He started to branch out into film, making a well-received documentary
about standout high school basketball players in 2008 called Gunnin for that #1
Spot. His production company Oscillascope helped distribute the ill-as-hell Banksy
“documentary” Exit Through the Gift Shop in 2010. Yauch was also behind the
incredible Beastie concert film “Awesome, I Fuckin Shot That”, which was put
together using hand held cameras from the audience.
That’s probably the last lesson the Beasties gave me, and
maybe the most important. Never stop growing. I’m 34 and I just started to
teach myself piano. I made a vow to start writing more. There are plans to
learn another language. We may grow up, we may grow older, but we have to keep
challenging ourselves and embracing what life throws at us. We need to put
ourselves out there, but also know when to withdraw and move on. And maybe most
critically of all, we need to have a sense of humor about everything. Life is
too short to take ourselves too seriously. Maybe you shouldn’t dress up like
someone from the Swiss Alps on MTV, but definitely have some fun once in
awhile.
So Adam Yauch and the Beastie Boys: thank you for everything. You helped me
make sense of my life during a pretty confusing time. You showed me that things
would be OK if I stayed true to myself and followed what I loved. You taught me
that it’s essential to keep searching. And, most critically, to have a sense of
humor about it.
RIP Adam Yauch aka
MCA aka Nathaniel Hornblower. You certainly left the world a better place.
Namaste.
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